Fostering Faith Dialogue

A group of young people from diverse backgrounds and faiths spend the evening eating together and talking about faith. 

Their reflections are interesting:

“I enjoyed the conversations because it wasn’t really like anything like I had ever experienced before…”

“This was one of the calmest conversations I have had. Everyone listened. I could acknowledge what I think is true and still listen to and understand another person’s view. It was very powerful to me. I have never had a conversation like that before.”

“I enjoyed discussing and listening to the differences between not just our own faiths but even the nuances between the same faiths, showing me that not everything is black and white.” 

“I liked that we could share our own ideas and learn from one another without agreeing on everything. I like that our differences became points of conversation and never contention.” 

“Hearing everybody speak so freely about their beliefs while respecting others, made me feel more comfortable to share mine more often, and more curious to listen to others.”

These young people are having discussions about faith and opinions about various issues, framed by guidelines for dialogue used by The Feast Youth Project.

These guidelines are not rocket-science. They really are quite simple. 
But they are not necessarily easy to put into practice.

However, when properly put into practice, they create an incredible space where meaningful, constructive and deep discussions can take place. 

The guidelines are:

• 1.   Listen to what everyone has to say. In other words, listen to understand, not to refute, or correct, or disprove someone else’s point of view

• 2.   Do not force others to agree with your view. In other words, allow others their point of view, without trying to persuade them that their view is wrong.

• 3.   Respect other people, even if you disagree with their view. In other words, treat others kindly and with dignity, even if their point of view makes you angry

• 4.   Do not tell others what they believe, let them tell you. In other words, avoid making assumptions about what someone else believes, but give them the opportunity to explain their perspective fully

• 5.   Speak positively of your point of view, not negatively about other people’s. In other words, explain your perspective without denigrating someone else’s perspective

• 6.   Be honest in what you say. In other words, don’t present a false front. Be genuine and demonstrate integrity

• 7.   Don’t treat someone as a spokesperson for their faith, culture or view. In other words, avoid blaming the person you are talking to for the faults of the community, or faith group they identify with.

• 8.   Don’t judge someone by what some people of their faith, culture or community do. In other words, avoid stereotyping someone according to the group they identify with.

• 9.   Acknowledge similarities and differences between our beliefs. In other words, it is good to notice where we are similar. It is also good to name the differences for what they are.

• 10.  Make every effort to get along with everyone, regardless of their faith, gender, ethnicity, ability or age. In other words, it is sometimes really costly to meet someone from a different group, who has different beliefs with openness of heart. But without that, good dialogue is not possible 

The Feast Youth Project has been bringing young people together for dialogue for over 15 years.

The format usually involves a shared activity, lots of food, and then some time for dialogue.

We frame the dialogue time around a guiding question.

It could be fairly low-key, such as, “What religious festival is the most meaningful for you and why?” 

Or they can be somewhat deeper: “What do you do to grow spiritually?” or “What gives you hope?” or “What is your perspective on …?”

We then go round the table and each person is given the opportunity to speak to the guiding question, without being interrupted. Those listening are encouraged to ask clarifying questions with the strict aim that those questions are framed in a way that invites further explanation, rather than to put the speaker on the defensive.

Once a person has finished explaining their perspective, the next person has the opportunity to share.

Only when every person has spoken to the guiding question, is the discussion opened up more widely, with a reminder of the guidelines for dialogue as a parameter within in which  the discussion develops.

The impact of these discussions is significant.

Time and time again, young people tell us that they have grown in confidence in terms of expressing their point of view and being understood.

They tell us they feel more comfortable is sharing their perspectives. They tell us they enjoyed being able to talk about their perspective, knowing the conversation will not turn into a battle.

They also tell us that the discussions helped shape their own perspective as they understood what other people were saying.

They tell us it has led to them being much more open and understanding of people who have a different point of view.

The longer we bring young people together for significant dialogue, the more we see how powerful and transformational it is to bring people who do not have the same beliefs or points of view together to share with one another.

We see what an impact it has on the individual young people and, in turn, on the communities they are part of. 

In a world that increasingly polarises people into belligerent camps, these spaces for dialogue fill us with hope for the future.